Be interested in philosophy – sure. Read up a little bit – why not. But study it – never, I told myself. I even made a note in my ‘don’t forget’ pocket book. I expected myself to not remember this conclusion. It was meant to be a double protection for myself. Don’t forget – never study philosophy. That was the message to myself.
But why not study philosophy and delve into the minds of some of the deepest and most profound thinkers in our history? There are plenty of reasons why you should engage yourself strongly with ideas and concepts that (partly) shaped the world. It gives you sense of agency. You might develop your own thoughts about what should be and what not. There is a change you learn to judge and perceive situations differently. You even might question oppressive forces and authorities around you intelligently.
So why not study philosophy? Perhaps because you cannot commit yourself fully to the thought. Ideas might be too advanced and take over your life. You might read something that catches your attention and is just so convincing and right. But your world permits you to commit to the idea and execute in your daily life. Even if you might try, you will only loose your mind.
All becomes negative. Everything is depressive. Nothing makes sense anymore.
Then, philosophy has taken over your life. The devilish thoughts have poisoned your intellect and coloured your soul black. No longer will you be able to see any positivity. In your perception, society is rotten and only getting worse. You understand the impossibility of changing anything. Decline is inevitable. Action-provoking thoughts are dead. Any motivation to do anything has faded. Only you understand how meaningless it all is.
Wouldn’t it be nice, if you hadn’t had these thoughts? Wouldn’t it be convenient, if someone else could lead the way? Let us all be guided by some meaning-providing structure?
So the circle closes. From questioning to meaninglessness to meaning-providing to questioning. An endless spiral without any exits. Really?